Thursday, October 25, 2007

When there are twelve people in your family, birthdays are a big deal


the anticipation was the best part. the presents weren't that great, but man, they stacked up high. they piled up on the sideboard throughout the course of the day, and by dinner time the amount of loot was impressive. one from each sibling (giving was mandatory) and at least a couple from the parents.

someone always decorated the dining room with crepe paper streamers, twisting them down from the ceiling light (which we grandly called a chandelier) to the four corners of the very long table. my mother baked a cake--chocolate, almost always. the birthday kid got to pick what we had for dinner (within reason; it had to be something that was on the regular rotation).

tragedy struck once, when i was quite small and ordered hamburgers and peas. "the really bright green ones," i said. "not the ugly ones." what i meant, of course, was frozen, not canned, but i didn't know peas by their containers. i knew peas by their color. my mother didn't pick up on that fine point, and for dinner we had hamburgers and canned peas. yuck. mushy. i was hugely disappointed. "i wanted the bright ones!" i said. "the really, really bright ones!"

my mother was cavalier. "oh, you wanted frozen peas," she said. "why didn't you say so?"

presents from my parents usually were books and clothes. I got the "little house" books, all out of order, over a series of several christmases and birthdays, and usually a sweater or a skirt. it was a good thing that my birthday came toward the beginning of the school year--i needed the birthday clothes to augment my one or two back-to-school outfits. otherwise, it was hand-me-down city, and my older sisters were all bigger than i was.

presents from my siblings were generally small bags of M&Ms, Hershey bars, maybe a squished Mars bar. surprise balls from woolworth's were popular; you unwrapped a ball of crepe paper, and as it unraveled, trinkets fell out. i think they were sold as party favors, but we gave them as gifts.

none of us had any money, and we were expected to buy these gifts out of our allowance. autumn was particularly spendy; there were five birthdays in october and one in late september. (make no comments here about my parents' sex life. LALALALALALLALA BECAUSE I'M NOT LISTENING.)

but there were also unexpected delights: one year a sister knitted clothes for my barbie doll, and the year i turned 9 my oldest brother gave me his copy of "A Swiss Family Robinson." he inscribed it for me and signed his name. i was too young for the book and was disappointed, but he died the next spring and the book became my most treasured possession.

the year i turned 17, we celebrated each october birthday with a themed party. the picture above is from my little sister's birthday; she was born on halloween. i had been seventeen for one week, and considered myself far too adult to try to look anything but sophisticated.

(unlike a few years later, when i dressed up like Harpo Marx.)

today i turn 51. i'm taking my floating holiday from work and have absolutely no plans or obligations. what will the day bring?

32 Leave a message!:

Byf said...

Happy birthday!

Jim said...

But, but, how can you post something dated on your birthday when it's still the day before?? Man, I gotta learn how to do that.

Okay, enough with the failed humor. Happy Birthday!

The Rotten Correspondent said...

Oh, I'm so glad that you're taking the day off. Good for you!

here's where the weird twin-ness thing pops up again, because I CAN'T SING A LICK (and seem to remember that you claim not to either) - so...

Happy Birthday to you...
(I'll stop now. No one needs broken eardrums on their 51st birthday).

Have a wonderful, wonderful day. Don't do a damn thing that's responsible or dull. Okay?

Kaycie said...

You know I have just three kids, but birthdays are a big deal for us, too. My kids give each other presents and hubby and I give the birthday kids presents, too, usually several, depending on how big. No crepe paper today, but our who-knows-how-many-years-old cardboard happy birthday sign is still strung across our mantle. It's very classy. My little one picked our dinner tonight (shrimp, scalloped potatoes, tiny crab cakes and hush puppies) and I made a cake for him (hot fudge sundae cake with French vanilla ice cream, with a heavy emphasis on the French from him). Then my husband spends the evening playing with the kids and their new toys, no matter how tired he is. Tonight they built cool things with new Legos. I hope they remember theirs as fondly as you remember yours.

The bit about your brother's gift of a book made me tear up.

Happy, happy birthday, Laurie. I hope you have a wonderful, relaxing day tomorrow.

Kaycie said...

Oh, and by the way, Laurie, you were quite a cutie at 17.

-Ann said...

Happy Birthday! Have fun doing exactly what you want to do!

ped crossing said...

Happy, happy birthday. My "daughter" had her birthday today too. There is a story to that, but I will blog about that later.

I hope you have a fun and relaxing day off. I also hope that your gifts are thoughtful and bring on the warm fuzzies.

Flowerpot said...

happy birthday and I hope you have a wonderful time. Bithday hugs across teh ocean!

Rough Hands said...

happy birthday laurie.your tale of no money, hand me downs and clothes and shoes for birthdays and christmas ring lots of bells. (santa had to keep us warm at all costs)
... and I love the superman costume in the background. A classic.
Go and enjoy your day.

Posie Rosie said...

Happy birthday, have a good one. Lovely to look back on all of those exciting memories, and like you say it isn't about money, it is the people, the love and the experiences. Hope this year's is spectacular!

Kellan said...

Happy Birthday - what a funny post - I really enjoyed it. "(make no comments here about my parents' sex life. LALALALALALLALA BECAUSE I'M NOT LISTENING.) - very funny. Have a good day. See ya.

Beccy said...

What a lovely trip down memory lane Laurie.

I hope you have a wonderful day today.

jan said...

Happy Birthday!

Conortje said...

Happy Birthday! What a wonderfully sweet nostalgic post. I could almost smell the feshly blown out birthday candles. I also teared up a bit.
Have a fantabulous day!

Beverley said...

Happy Birthday, Laurie. I bet your best present is that Boscoe's OK. I like your description of the presents. One of the advantages of large families, I would imagine, is that you got a lot of presents! The best presents are those in which thought has gone into them ('it's the thought that counts' Do you say that in the US?). Yes , those Haiku poems are surprisingly easy to write LOL.

menopausaloldbag (MOB) said...

I have only just visited your blog but happy birthday. The dogs are cuties. I'm a Scot but I worked for Unisys and spent a lot of time in Minneapolis. I love the place and have some good friends there. I was always intrigued by Pilot's knob Road! It was somewhere off the 494 before you got to 35w. Have a nice day!

wakeupandsmellthecoffee said...

Happy Birthday, Laurie. It's not the size or cost of the gift -- it's the feeling behind it. Thank you for giving us all these wonderful posts to read. It's a pleasure reading you.

menopausaloldbag (MOB) said...

Thanks for visiting my blog - I was here reading yours when you snuck in there! Another year to go eh before the big one hits? I wish you good fortune with it and I can always be on hand to emapthise should you get the full whammy of symptoms! You might luck out and sail through it.

Sandy said...

Happy Birthday, Laurie. Our family also has a ton of October birthdays - January is cold, right? How nice that your parents taught all of you how to give as well as how to receive. Well done.

laurie said...

jeff: thanks!

jim: i like to post-date. it's like getting the October issue of the atlantic when it's still September.

RC: it's a grand tradition for me, taking off my birthday and then absolutely squandering the day.

kaycie: i would have picked shrimp, too, had i ever heard of it back then. i think i was in my 20s the first time i had shrimp. we lived on beef and a very little bit of chicken.

-ann: thanks! i loved your belated fun monday posting.

ped: me, your "daughter," and pablo picasso. we are in good company.

flowerpot: thank you!

rough hands: yep, big family, no money. my dad was half-irish, you know, and i think it's a grand tradition to have more kids than you can afford. we never felt like we didn't have money, until we were in our teens, i guess, and started caring about clothes. but that huge mound of presents was impressive; it made me feel quite rich.

posie, kellan, beccy, jan: thank you! thanks for visiting, kellan.

conor: yum. i wish i had some birthday cake NOW.

beverley: you're right about boscoe's health being the best gift. on the morning walk today, he rolled in the grass for the first time in two weeks. yes, he limped a little getting up, but still...

MOB: welcome! i know that road well. well, not really well because i try to avoid the southern suburbs. but i've driven it. where in scotland do you live? ive been to edinburgh, pilochtry, perth... i like it there.

coffee: i think often the thought behind the childhood gifts was "i have to give you this candy bar but i'd rather eat it myself!" but you're right, it is really enough just to be remembered. gifts are optional.

Lane said...

Yay! Big Hippy Birthday to you and I hope frozen peas are on the menu for old times sake:-)
x

Self employed mum said...

Happy Birthday from me too. The book, that was so lovely, these are just the most precious gifts. Enjoy your day. x

laurie said...

sandy: i agree. giving birthday presents was not optional in my family. i think it taught a good lesson.

lane: that's a terrific idea!

self-employed mum: thanks. and yes, i still have the book. haven't read it in years, but i do take it down every now and then and look at the inscription. i still treasure it.

Stepping Over the Junk said...

I sure hope you write about what you did with your day today!

I am laughing about the frozen peas!

Amy said...

Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday, dear Laurie, happy birthday to you!

Good idea taking the day off. Make it great.

leslie said...

Happy Birthday! Enjoy the weather and spend some time relaxing on the porch!

Swearing Mother said...

Happy Birthday Laurie!

By my reckoning you must have been conceived just after Christmas or even around St. Valentine's day, oh how romantic.

Sorry. Just remembered you said no one was to mention your ... LALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALALA

OK Laurie, you can come out now.

Crystal Jigsaw said...

A very happy birthday to you. Have a wonderful day with your wonderful memories. Take care.

Crystal xx

Jen said...

Happy Birthday, and Bonne Fete.

We didn't do big things for birthdays until our daughter came along. Now I get the joy of planning our first "party" for people other than family.

I hope your day brings you much joy!

Bookwoman said...

Happy birthday, laurie. Hope it was a perfect day.

Willowtree said...

Hippo, birdie, two ewes.
Hippo, birdie, two ewes.
Hippo, birdie.
Hippo, birdie.
Hippo, birdie, two ewes.

Damn, if I weren't two years older than you I could give you some grief about being an old fart!!

bermudabluez said...

Happy Birthday!!! Hope you had a relaxing day!!