the gods of work are laughing at me

my last week of work i worked a lot of overtime. so i was expecting a particularly big paycheck the next friday--a check that would help me sail through my four weeks of unpaid time off without dipping too far into my savings.

paycheck arrives. no overtime.

i emailed work.

um, where's my money?

don't worry, it'll be on your next check, they emailed back.

i emailed again. i'm on leave. my next check won't be until september, i wrote. (in a plaintive way, i hoped, rather than a whiny way.) it won't get lost before then, will it?

they emailed again. we'll issue you a check next pay period for the overtime pay.

this sounded fine. i'd get a paycheck right in the middle of my unpaid time off. how convenient!

the check was direct-deposited into my account last friday. today i got around to going to the ATM and finding out precisely how much it was. i'm thinking, maybe five hundred dollars, maybe a thousand bucks! who knows? twenty hours of overtime, at time and a half? i am no good at math, but i figured it'd be a tasty amount.

the ATM spit out the receipt: DEPOSIT RECEIVED ON FRIDAY AUGUST 24 OF $19.58

say what?

$19.58.

ok, i realize i'm no good at math, but that works out to be ...... (times two) (carry the four) (divided by sixteen...) ... ABOUT A DOLLAR AN HOUR.

i was so mad i sent another email. um, where's my money?

deductions, they told me crisply. because the overtime payment was issued as a separate check and not folded into a weekly pay check (as it should have been), they had to take out all of the deductions they normally take. taxes, yes, i'd figured that. and social security. but parking? and health club? and 401K? and credit union? and life insurance? and medical insurance? and dental insurance? i'm on leave! i'm not using any of those things!

i wrote again. i paid those insurance payments in advance, before going on leave, i said. i gave you a check in late july. you shouldn't have deducted for them again.

well, computers, you know. software. it's all set up a certain way. they had no choice. when they issue a check, the deducations are automatically taken out. their hands are tied. they'll work it all out next week, when i'm back at work. (oh, those words, those sad, ugly words.)

so i don't want to be too dramatic about all this (although i admit i was feeling a little dramatic when i first realized what had happened), but it's hard not to look at this as a sign from the gods of work. the problem is, i have never been very good at interpreting signs. so what does this one say?

some possibilities:

run! it's not worth it!

or maybe, it's time to vote for someone who will bring universal health care to america

or maybe, work is going to be just exactly as frustrating when you go back as it was when you left

i have one more weekend to figure it out.